My Rich Nigerian Boo – Chapter 13

“May 2019 be a blessed year for all of you. May your dreams and goals be achieved” – Lesego Maake


It’s not a secret that a woman’s punani has contributed to many men’s downfall. Many men lose their sense of thinking when they see a woman’s thighs. I thought it was going to work on Ifechi but it failed with flying colours. “Look, I am not like your South African boys who are easily fooled by yellow thighs and forget about the most important thing in life. I am a Nigerian, money is my language. Your thighs will not make me change my mind about you going to Durban. I can separate business from pleasure,” he said casually. I was so pissed if I was from Limpopo I would have unleashed a high calibre lightning to him. I even lost appetite to have him. He didn’t seem to care. All he wanted was for me to hit the road to Durban to deliver the his cargo. I got dressed and told him he was a fool. He burst out laughing.


“I am ready. If anything happens to me in Durban my family will deal with you,” I said to him. He walked me to the car and wished me good luck. So many thoughts were going through my mind. I thought of calling Marcia and ask her to drive with me to Durban but knew she wouldn’t agree. Marcia was one of those girls who loved appearing during the time to eat. I called my little brother and told him he was the best thing in my life. He told me he missed me and was looking forward to eating his birthday cake. My heart was so sore because I was doing jobs for Nigerians to protect him. Just after passing Heidelburg I saw a road block from about half a kilometre away. I pulled over on the side of the road and pretended to be peeing. There was no way I was going to throw myself in there.



I called Ifechi and his phone was off. I wanted to tell him about the road block. I got back in the car and sat for over five minutes contemplating on what to do next. I couldn’t not afford to celebrate my brother’s birthday from prison. I closed my eyes and gave a short prayer. I started the engine and drove towards the road block. I knew it was risky but it had to be done. I didn’t want to upset Ifechi and his so-called business associates. Few metres from the road block one cop looked straight at the car I was driving and commanded me to pull over. My first instinct was to pass at high speed. When I saw branded Golf 7 GTI’s I knew I wouldn’t go far. I pulled over on the side of the road and waited for the cop to come.


He was one of those fat cops with bums that look like a volcanic mountain. He greeted me and I greeted back. He asked where I was going and I told him I was visiting a friend in Durban. He asked for my licence and I handed it to him. He checked it while surveying the car with his eyes. He asked to search the car and I asked if it was necessary. He gave me a funny look and I nodded. I was nervous at that stage. He headed to the boot. Within 30 seconds he started whistling. “My sister, who do you work for? I know these things are not yours. You better tell me the truth or you will rot in jail. Please come out of the car and tell me the truth,” he expressed. I got out of the car and walked to the back. “Officer, I am sure we can come to some sort of an arrangement. I know you guys earn peanuts. I can give you R5000. Your family probably needs it,” I said trying to keep a calm face.


Deep down I was boiling with fear. I knew I was standing on the door of jail. Naijas are very smart. They don’t do the dirty job. They send people to do their job so that when cops cause havoc they won’t be part of it. I blamed myself for allowing Ifechi to use me. “I want you to listen and listen carefully, I don’t take bribes from anyone. I am a Christian and will never ever sin like that. I am going to arrest you for these drugs. You and your people are the reason this country is messed up. Follow me,” he said angrily. I could see he was serious. These people who go to church regularly are a problem. “Malome cop, I understand you are a Christian but holy spirit is not seven colours. You family will not eat holy spirit. Take this money and pretend you saw nothing,” I begged.


It was at that stage that he took out handcuffs. I knew it was over with me. I looked behind me and saw a chance to run for my life. As I was about to employ my legs he grabbed and pulled me towards him. I tried to apologise but he didn’t give a toss. As he was about to cuff me I heard gunshots coming from a direction of some Audi A3 that was being searched by other cops not very far from where I was. Officer Bum produced his gun and used my car as a cover. I quickly got in the car. More shots followed and Officer Bum and other cops tactically headed towards the A3. Jikijiki I heard wheels screeching. The A3 sped off just like that. I took advantage of the situation and started the engine. Officer Bum didn’t even see me when I passed next to them. I think one of their members was on the floor bleeding. A kilometre or two from the road block I remembered something:


My drivers’ licence


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