“People are always fascinated by infidelity because, in the end – whether we’ve had direct experience or not – there’s part of you that knows there’s absolutely no more piercing betrayal. People are undone by it.” – Junot Diaz
We live in a very messed up world. People will forgive you for killing their family members, but would rather commit suicide than forgive you for shagging their partners. I was not expecting Marcia there at that moment. I thought she would still be in hospital fixing the damage I did on her. Luyanda looked so lost and confused. He was tight-lipped for few seconds. Marcia pointed a finger at him and screamed, “HOW COULD YOU SLEEP WITH MY FRIENDS? WHILE I WAS IN HOSPITAL DYING YOU WERE BUSY WITH MY FRIEND. DO YOU EVEN LOVE ME? YOU ARE SUCH A TYPICAL XHOSA MAN. I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT I WAS THINKING DATING A LOSER LIKE YOU. As for you Palesa, I can’t believe you planned this. You bit me last night so you could disappear with my man. I will never forgive you for this.”
At that stage I was not sure if I was angry at Marcia for being stupid or Luyanda for raping me. “Marcia, I really can’t believe you. You have the guts to accuse me of sleeping with your man after everything that happened last night? I don’t have time for this crap. I want to go to my place,” I said angrily. I tried to get up but Marcia pushed me. Luyanda stood between us and told Marcia to calm down. “WTF, are you really gonna take her side? Oh wow, I cannot believe this. No one is going to leave this place until you confess to what you did last night. I want nothing but the truth or else blood will flow,” said Marcia in a cheeky demeanour. That was rich coming from someone who left her boyfriend and slept with someone she didn’t even know. I was lost for words. I didn’t even know what to say to her.
I expected Luyanda to tell her where to get off but he was such a softie on her. He was different from the monster he was the night before when he forced himself on me. I decided burst the anger I had inside me. “Marcia, I didn’t sleep with your boyfriend, he forced himself on me. He raped me. Your boyfriend refused to take me to my place last night. I was sleeping on this couch and he he he forced himself on me,” I said with tears tiptoeing on my cheeks. Marcia looked at me and laughed. It was quite clear she was not buying what I said. In an era where a woman is raped every second, it’s quite disgusting that it’s always other women who cast doubts whenever a woman says she has been raped. I was not shocked at Marcia’s behaviour.
I got up and told her not to touch me. I got dressed and headed to the door. I could feel I didn’t want to spend another minute in that place. I walked from Maboneng to Braamfontein. It was the longest distance I ever walked ever since I moved to Joburg. Many guys tried to offer me lifts but I refused. I knew they didn’t want to help, all they wanted was to tap. That’s how many guys out there see us, objects to be tapped. Just as I was about to enter our building, someone grabbed my hand. It was Una. I asked him to leave me alone and he said he wanted to talk to me. I tried to release my hand from his grip but he refused. He pulled me to his car. I didn’t have any energy left in me. All I wanted was to get to my place and sleep. I was still hurting from what happened the night before.
“Listen Pali, I want to apologise for what happened last night. I behaved out of character and for that I apologise. I love you very much. I don’t want to lose you. Please find it in your heart to forgive me. I promise I will do whatever you want to show how sorry I am. You can have your car back. I can buy a townhouse in your name today,” Una begged. Only if he knew all those promises he made could not reverse what happened when he left me stranded in Sandton. I had no intensions of forgiving him. I told him I was not in a good space to talk. He opened a bag full of money and told me to take whatever I wanted. I told him I didn’t want money or anything from him.
He looked shocked I refused to take money. Nigerian guys think South African women cannot say no to money. That is why they use money to lure us to do whatever they want us to do. “Una, I got raped last night. Marcia’s boyfriend forced himself on me. It’s all your fault because you left me stranded in Sandton. I will never forgive you for that. I trusted you and thought you would protect me at all times. You failed me last night,” I said with sobs interrupting my vocal cords. I saw Una’s complexion turning navy blue on the spot. He asked me to show him where Luyanda stayed. I refused to tell him. He took out a gun and pointed it at me. “TAKE ME TO HIS PLACE NOW.” I had no choice but to take him to Maboneng. Luckily I remembered the apartment number. Una kicked the door.
There was a pool of blood on the floor.